Time: Ahead Behind

I AM
BEHIND TIME

IN EVERYTHING
I THINK I WANT
TO TRY TO WISH TO DO
AND DON'T

WONDERING IF IT MATTERS
TO TIME:
IF IT IS SEEING, HEARING,
WONDERING, JUDGING.

I LIVE
OR AM I BEING
UNKNOWN TO ME
LIVED
BY LIFE
APPARENTLY PUSHING AND
DRAGGING ME
EVENTUALLY TO LEAVE ME

UNRESOLVED,
RATHER THAN DO,
I DON'T
RATHER THAN USE TIME
I STEP OUT OF IT
AND PLAINTIVELY
LET IT OVERTAKE ME
IGNORE ME

IS TIME BAFFLED
BY MY INEPTITUDE
AND CLUMSY INVOLUNTARY MOTIONS
THROUGH IT
INTO IT, OR OUT OF IT

WHAT IS TIME ANYWAY
AND FOR THAT MATTER, I?