Time: Ahead Behind

I am

behind time

in everything

I think I want

to try to wish to do

and don't

wondering if it matters

to time:

if it is seeing, hearing

wondering, judging

I live

or am I being

unknown to me

lived

by life

pushing and dragging me

eventually to leave me

unresolved

rather than do

I don't

rather than use time

I step out of it

and plaintively

let it overtake me

ignore me

if time baffled

by my ineptitude

my clumsy involuntary motions

through it

into it

or out of it

what is time anyway

and for that matter, I